Introduction


Presented in reverse chronology, this history stretches from the present back to the Fellowship's 1970 founding, and beyond.
(See "Blog Archive" in the sidebar below.) It draws from many sources, including The Fellowship of Friends - Living Presence Discussion, the Internet Archive, the former Fellowship of Friends wiki project, cult education and awareness sites, news archives, and from the editor's own 13-year experience in the Fellowship.

The portrait that emerges stands in stark contrast to sanitized versions presented on the Fellowship's array of
alluring websites, and on derivative sites created by Burton's now-estranged
disciple, Asaf Braverman.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

"Kid Shellen" tells just a bit of his story...

"Kid Shellen" [aka "Kid Shelleen"] wrote on the Fellowship of Friends Discussion blog, February 27, 2007:
In 1999, after 15 years of working on myself, I left the FoF. I wasn’t negative at or about Robert; at that time I didn’t know a quarter of what I know now. I actually thought he might be what he professed to be, but that didn’t make any difference to me anymore. Something had been gnawing at my insides for several years and finally that fall, it erupted into my life in many ways. Leaving the fellowship was just the first of many, very “un-me” things I’d do.

What launched me out was my realization that I had become a Fundamentalist in my thinking. I went to meeting after meeting hoping to hear something that was not the same old regurgitated dogma. No luck. I couldn’t speak the truth, nor could my friends. I’d hear myself spouting angles, all the time thinking, “I don’t really know that for certain.” I thought Ouspensky said that the Fourth way was dogma-free. No luck there, either.

At the same time, unprocessed parts of my past started to haunt me. I was just to leap over them and be in the present, right? This became harder and harder to do. I had heard many times, from many students that the school was not psychotherapy. “If you have issues, take them to a therapist, do not bring them to meetings.” If you can’t share the truth of your life with your friends, who can you share it with?

So I decided it was time for something new. I knew I needed to work through a lot of my past and I knew the FoF was not going to be any help. I also knew that I needed a new way of thinking and being.

After leaving, a lot of extraordinary things happened, and I realize now what I Don’t Know. All that is a tale for another post. Glad to hear your stories; and as Bob [Dylan] said: “Don’t follow leaders/Watch your parking meters.”

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